Increasing Motivation

This is from more research that I have done. Tommorow I get to test it out. Wish me luck.

Reversing Demoralization and
Increasing Motivation in Your Child


Many times, in our effort to see children succeed, we will push them or require that they put in “more effort.” We comment on many aspects of their performance-trying to be constructive. Children and adolescents commonly see these comments as micromanaging, criticism, or as evidence that we care more about their grades and performance than we care about them. They frequently end up feeling demoralized and adopt a “what’s the use?” attitude.

We must remember that what we consider helpful comments may be perceived as criticism and negative. Our efforts to help them may result in feelings of hopelessness, a drop in morale, self-esteem, motivation and, ultimately, a strain in our relationship with them.

To reverse this drop in morale and strain in our relationship, we must:

Limit the number of comments

First, remember that it is better to note the positives. If you feel compelled to comment, then limit your “constructive comments” to one per event, whether it be homework, athletics, or friendship skills.
Example: “Keep your eye on the ball, just like you did on the last pitch.”
Instead of: “Keep your eye on the ball, elbow up, choke up on the bat, plant your foot, follow through, etc.”

Notice movement in the right direction

Second, it is most important to note behaviors that show your child that they are moving in the right direction (even though their performance may be far from adequate, much less perfection.) Without some encouragement even small changes will cease to exist. Big changes and substantial improvements only occur from a succession of small changes.
Example: “You’ve gotten both socks on without being reminded!”

Lower the bar and raise it as they progress.